"Right so i put my tongue behind here like this and my mouth like so!
- R u sure this is what it said and its def gonna help us pull??"
"Course Cindy crawford totally swears by it." - Kellie

"hmmm" thought Elizabeth "one does not believe that this establishment is the groucho club, and henceforth i shall take my leave of this disgusting pit, after i've finished my smirnoff ice" - Donnie Brasco

'Sarah seemed confused as her friends warned her the blue-shirted, malfunctioning T-1000 terminator was heading her way.' - Pink_haired_girl

'debbie desperately tries to escape Dallas's deadly sleeper hold!' - Bryso

" ah go on...let me gob in to your hand so i don't have to go to the loo...if you loved me you would!" - Clare

After shopping all week for something special, Joanne had her new top ruined in the scrabble trying to get served at the bar! - Graham

Kelly would have ended up at the Windsor if it hadn't been for the support and encouragement of her imaginary friend. - Carrie

'As Debbie waved at the camera, Lucy's bowels, for a long time on their last legs, finally collapsed.' - Pauline

after seeing Margaret's carefully grafted 3rd arm George and Henry discuss how they might do the same with their 3rd leg. - Ann-Marie

"Run Forrest, Run!" - Gary

Just at that moment the wind changed and everyone realised that the grown ups really did tell the truth. - JRD

"Oh My God!! We're leaving... She's only just gone and dressed the same as me now!" - Jonny Beggs

"Great, while she's staring at that bloke with the camera I can check out her assets... Oh bugger, was that a flash?" - Kayeso

"So I put the gun to his head like this and said, 'Motson, hand over the coat...' " - Kayeso